Get Over Yourself... We're Only Disabled! Part 17

 Get Over Yourself... We're Only Disabled!

Hey my lovely readers, hope you are well.  

Chapter 17


Whether we’re male or female, ask us what gender we prefer for care, don’t assume 


When we are receiving support, such as personal care, it is important to make sure that we are consulted about whether we prefer to have a particular gender support us.  This helps us to feel comfortable and dignified.  For example, males might be more comfortable to receive care from a male and females might be more comfortable with females.  


I prefer to receive care from females as this makes me feel more comfortable.  It allows me to talk more freely about my care.  I wouldn’t want to discuss my periods with a male!


From a social point of view, it is also important to ask whether we prefer to be with a certain gender for activities.  For example, boys might prefer to go down the pub and watch football with a male (unless there is a female who really enjoys football!).  I prefer to go shopping with a female, particularly if I’m shopping for clothes, personal items or make-up.


This is about giving us a choice.  It may be easier to presume something but asking us is important protocol.  


We might want to receive care from different genders depending on the activity, so follow our lead on this.  For example, if we require support with a drink, we might be happy to receive this from whoever is free at the time.  However, if we want a bath, this might be more specific!  


For people with communication difficulties, who may be unable to ask or state their preference, give them a choice and allow them decide in their own way; this will encourage them to be independent. Just because they may not be able to voice their opinion, they can still tell you what they want using an assistive device or another way they feel comfortable with to show you how they are feeling.  This is very important as we all have emotions and preferences and people need to respect this. 


As people get older they go through puberty and might be less comfortable in their bodies, with various physical changes.  They might be more aware that they’ve developed and with these changes there may be feelings of embarrassment.  A recognition of this is crucial because this is about self-awareness and dignity.

  

There is a big difference between banter and embarrassing comments.  So people need to be careful about what they say because individuals can take things more personally than others, and may feel intimidated.  Some people might find something funny but some things may hurt their feelings. People just need to think about what they are saying and whether it is or isn't appropriate.


If people don't take an individual’s personal choices seriously, this can make us feel down and we may worry that our best interest isn’t at the heart of the care.  We need to feel like we are getting the best support and care to become stronger and be able to be in control of our lives.  This is why we may prefer to receive care from the same gender to feel more confident about ourselves.


It’s just making sure that the person can feel comfortable around people that are caring for them. Also, it’s important that the level of care they’re given is at the right pace for them, so they can keep progressing towards becoming independent.  Giving someone a choice is giving them that bit more guidance towards doing it for themselves.  So offering them what they may prefer helps them to grow in their independence.  


Thank you for reading my blog 


Abbie xx


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